Jokes for all occasions: pessimism

The energetic New England woman addressed her hired girl in a discouraged tone:

“Here it is Monday morning and to-morrow will be Tuesday, and the next day Wednesday—the whole week half gone, and nothing done yit!”

* * *

The old man shook his head dolefully in response to an inquiry concerning his health.

“It isn’t what it ought to be,” he declared. “I find my strength is failing. It used to be I could walk around the block every morning. But now lately, somehow, when I’m only half way round, I feel so tired I have to turn and come back.”

* * *

The visitor remarked affably to the man of the house:

“Your family is wonderfully talented. One son plays the cornet, two daughters play the piano and the guitar, and your wife plays the banjo, and the other children play ukuleles. As the father of such musical geniuses, you must be something yourself, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” was the answer, “I am a pessimist.”